Divorce is a time of
drastic change for any family. Sometimes a divorce can bring out the
worst in people, and they may show their true character during such a
challenge. If you've discovered something that leads you to seek
custody of your grandchildren while their parents are divorcing, know
that you're not alone.
PBS reports that 2.7
million grandparents
are raising their grandkids.
Responsibilities of parenting your grandchildren deserve serious
thought. The lives of you, your spouse, and your grandkids will be
dramatically altered, but that can be an overall positive thing.
Consider these things if you want custody of your grandkids.
Know the Realities
If you are going to
seek custody of your grandchildren, you need to go into this battle
knowing that it won't be easy. The odds aren't necessarily in your
favor since courts tend to want children to stay with their parents
whenever feasible.
Don't set yourself up
for heartbreak and a succession of disappointments. Know that the
courts aren't set up to ensure your success, even if you would
provide a good home for your grandchildren. In most cases, courts
don't give grandparents custody. Go into the process with realistic
expectations and the best interests of your grandchildren at heart.
Gather Evidence
If you are seeking
custody of your grandchildren because one or both of their parents is
an unfit parent, you need to gather evidence of claims that you're
making. Be sure that you state the truth and not just your
suspicions.
If the situation is
serious enough, work with law enforcement and an attorney to gather
as much evidence as you can to support the claims you're making. If
your grandchildren are being abused, contact law enforcement
immediately to have them removed from the situation right away. If a
parent being around a child is harmful to that child, the judge may
deny that parent any sort of access to the child.
Discuss Consequences
With a Lawyer
If you file for custody
of your grandchildren, you may alienate both your own adult child and
their soon-to-be ex-spouse. That can have long-term consequences on
how often you may see your grandchildren in the future. Discuss all
the potential negative consequence of seeking custody with an
experienced family law attorney.
If you feel compelled
to seek custody despite the possible consequences or even potential
family alienation, you may still want to make a pros and cons list
before you take any legal action. Then assess the list, weighing the
risks against the rewards. Be very clear that you want to file for
custody before you do so.
Talk to Your
Grandchildren's Parents
You may be able to
amicably resolve the issue without any alienation in the family.
Sometimes parents who aren't up for the task of parenting realize
their shortcomings in childcare. They may be supportive of you taking
on full custody of your grandchildren. On the other hand, you
may not be able to discuss details with your adult child if they are
absent from your grandkids' lives.
According to the Legal
Aid Society of Cleveland, Ohio law offers two choices that can give
you temporary custody of your grandchildren. You may be able to
get a grandparent power of attorney that would be signed by both you
and a parent. That could grant you temporary custody. Alternately,
you may be able to get a grandparent caretaker authorization
affidavit if the parents cannot be found.
Finally, if you feel
that obtaining custody of your grandkids is in their best interests,
speak to a family law attorney as soon as possible. Mary
E. Papcke, Attorney at Law, is an experienced lawyer who also has
a degree in counseling, which can be helpful for sorting out the
complexities involved with this kind of case. Reach out today for a
free consultation to discuss your situation.
